Drug of choice

Sex always sells.Death is a thrill.Imitate my lack of patience.How much we pay to be tailor made fashions fade the trends will change.In your eyes is the picture perfect In your eyes does the grass look greener have you seen it through my eyes.... The world has caught on fire from what I've been told these city lights are killing ever slowly the sanity with-in me maybe I lost in my creation. This isn't how i thought I'd turn out. I have to block out thoughts of you, so I don't lose my head They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed, dropping little reels of tape, to remind me that I'm alone. Playing movies in my head that make a loneliness feel like my best friend. There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain an ounce of peace is all I want for you, Will you never call again? and will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face? and will you never try to reach me, it is I that wanted space.. Its not your Cause... One Day you will forget this! So hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things i didnt do for you, hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow.

Hate me so you can finally see whats good for you

Smoke and Mirrors

The past few months have taught me a lot. falling in and out of love, Actions and Motives. Fate turns me victim to everything I have done. Oh what tingled webs we weave when we practice to deceive. I just don't get it.. why it has to end this way! I found the perfect one but I cannot hold on because the fates see my future differently. She built me from scratch... my soul shared the same reflection as hers. Why don't you see you and i share the same reflection why don't you see that we cannot survive in this condition if you're cut i'll bleed so go on. Carve into your own heart i could use a new scar or a brand new start, slowly severing the only memories that bind us as one.We have lost all communication when words fall on deaf ears i'm starting to feel ,a transformation how did i get here i don't recognize my own reflection it's a ghost of what once was gone from relative to stranger separating body from mind. I just don't know how to win with you, i can't let go part of me. Please will
you stay the same i'll remain to change.

I'm Sorry I have to Let Go! We are dying in slow motion.

As you are I was! And as I am You Will be!

Time doesn't change people, It removes the shadows from your eyes
An enlightenment, a light at the end of the tunnel
A knowledge of Ages, my perception to make the world just
we are never alone the paths we choose,
so many feet have walked on, so much dead skin
yet the road is still new, I think about a solution
yet a solution stares me in the face!
Is she the one? Where did I go wrong?
I Just wanna be free...... I'm done with these thots!
Tonight I will Jump....... My only Solution!...
You never know until the deed is done...
I will talk to you...... I only pray you will Listen!

 I am not The First.........
                                      I will not be the Last!

Lips staind with a crimson drop

-------------------------------------------


I get lost in your melody
Our youthful pair are paralyzed by
the coils of the unforgiving trap
I learnt if firey feelings
are strong within your soul,
pierce with the wavering blade
gently like water
and passionately like a blossom
despite shutting the destined tears,
deep within our eyes,
Thinking of the myriad stars that rain down upon us
how the blood tethers of our deep bond
Even if the glowing eyes that sparkle with a sapphire shine
are shut by a herald of darkness,
no one can take away the bridge woven in dreams
so let those eyes reflect the infinite tomorrow
hold my hand , forget about forever
my eternal embrace

Its never love

Recently...
I went all out to impress a bird, but my efforts......
well they were not that promising. My head span with thoughts of confusion.
If we could just be friends, start all over again. If this feelings were not just....

For the first time I thought the world was fair.......
but I did not see her poker face!!!!!


INFATUATION!!

I just want to forget...

You were the best I ever had

Now I know I messed up bad
You were the best I ever had
I let you down in the worst way
It hurts me every single day
I'm dying to let you know

Now I'm here to say I'm sorry
And ask for a second chance
Cause when it all comes down to the end
I could sure use a friend

So many things I would take back
You were the best I ever had
I don't blame you for hating me
I didn't mean to make you leave

You and I were living like a love song
I feel so bad, I feel so bad that you're gone
Now I know you're the only one that I want
I want you back, I want you

And ask for a second chance
All I want to do is make it up to you
Cause when it all comes down to the end
You were the best I ever had

We fell in love for a reason
Now you're leaving
And I just want you back
So many things we believed in
Now you're leaving and words won't bring you back
I'll never let go of the heart I broke


I can't believe that I threw away all our dreams
I can't believe now that you're gone how much you mean to me
I feel so bad, I feel so bad
You were the best I ever had
I can't believe that I threw away all our dreams
I can't believe now that you're gone how much you mean to me
I feel so bad, I feel so bad
You were,
You were the best I ever had

This is how I always see her my Empress

your steps

If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine,my tunes played on the harp unstrung,would you hear my voice,and come through the music?
THE PATH IS FOR YOUR STEPS ALONE!

your steps

If my words did glow with the gold of sunshine,my tunes played on the harp unstrung,would you hear my voice,and come through the music?
THE PATH IS FOR YOUR STEPS ALONE!

Saviour

It kills me not to know this but i've all but jst forgotten
what the color of her eyes were and her scars or how she got them
As the telling signs of age rain down a single tear is dropping
Thru the valleys of an aging face that this world has forgotten
there is no reconciliation that will put me in my place
And there is no time like the present to drink these draining seconds
But seldom do these words ring true when im constantly failing you
Like walls that we just can't break through until we disappear...

Digital Love(Daft Punk *Best Song ever*)

Last night I had a dream about you
In this dream I'm dancing right beside you
And it looked like everyone was having fun
the kind of feeling I've waited so long

Don't stop come a little closer
As we jam the rythm gets stronger
There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun
We were dancing all night long

The time is right to put my arms around you
You're feeling right
You wrap your arms around too
But suddenly I feel the shining sun
Before I knew it this dream was all gone

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
I wish this dream comes true

*******Why don't you play the game ?******

Digital Love(Daft Punk *Best Song ever*)

Last night I had a dream about you
In this dream I'm dancing right beside you
And it looked like everyone was having fun
the kind of feeling I've waited so long

Don't stop come a little closer
As we jam the rythm gets stronger
There's nothing wrong with just a little little fun
We were dancing all night long

The time is right to put my arms around you
You're feeling right
You wrap your arms around too
But suddenly I feel the shining sun
Before I knew it this dream was all gone

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
I wish this dream comes true

*******Why don't you play the game ?******

Angel on my shoulder

Through dark foggy days, love shines
Again our mellow souls have a cause,
a sweeter virtue...Vice?
We never know until it cuts,
They say the first cut is always the deepest,
will I bleed?
I have an angel on my shoulder,
But a devil in my hand......
what to do with this love?
I tell myself No means No...
But I fall for this vice again
.....virtue?
But when It rains it pours
And the sun will be out again...
To love again...
Like the angel on my right!

hand in hand

And the tears fall like rain,
Down my face again,
the words you wouldn't say,
And the games you played,
With my young foolish heart,
I should have known this from the start,
Going hand in hand
Just like my love and pain
How the thought of you cuts deep within the vein
Oh this brand new skin stretched across scared terrain
I don't want to be let down
I don't want to live my life again
Don't want to be lead down the same old road
I don't want to live my lies again
Don't want to be lead down the same old road
I dont want YOU!...

To day i made a girl I like cry:

06/04/2010

Things really tend to be complicated when an around her. Lets call her Lexy :) She came over just to say Hi! But whenever we are around each other things tend to be a little too intimate. Every time her soft fair skin brushes against mine.I feel a rush of blood to my head.Its like I can breath again. I know I love her because I do dumb things when am around her. I am usually a composed lad, but she messes up my composure.

I have never felt sorry for anything unlike the guilt I felt today. Just a simple kiss can bring up 1000 flames of Hades. I did not sleep for 48hours the guilt was eating me inside. Why do we hurt the ones we love? Is life really that hard to tame?

The guilt still hangs over me she pointed out a part of me I never want to see again. The reason for my seclusion: A safe heaven for my emo soul. I am sorry Lexy :(

I do not know i f, I will be able to face her again. My legs want to turn and run but my soul seeks piece. How will I get there if my Legs wont help. In this ignorance please Let me stay(Ignorance is bliss).

This dark Detail will be remembered for eons to come.... when will it rain so I can cover my tears?

Why?

If you try to fail and succeed, what have
you done?

How is it one careless match can start a
forest fire, but it takes a whole box to
start a campfire?

Why is the time when the traffic is slowest
called rush-hour?

What's the speed of dark?

If physics can predict lottery numbers,
why are they still working?

If you run backwards will you gain weight?

If Barbie is so popular, why do you need to
buy her friends?

What happens when you get scared
half-to-death twice?

Can a blind person feel blue?

How can a house burn up when it burns
down?

Are you telling the truth when you lie in
bed?

If your vacuum cleaner really sucks, is it a
bad thing?

How do you know when a Smurf
suffocates?

Despite the cost of living, why does it
remain so popular?

If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how
would you know?

In Chinese why are the words for crisis
and opportunity the same?

Why does X stand for a kiss?

Why does O stand for a hug?

Why is the alphabet in that order?

How does skating on thin ice get you into
hot water?

Why are they called stands when there
made for sitting?

Doesn't expecting the unexpected make
the unexpected expected?

When cheese gets its picture taken what
does it say?

Why are they called non-stick pans? Is
there a law saying your not allowed to put
sticks in them?

Why are a wise-man and a wise-guy
opposites?

If work is so terrific how come they have
to pay you to do it?

Should crematoriums give discounts for
those who died in fires?

Is it possible to have a civil-war?

If the #2 pencil the most popular, why is it
still #2?

Do tea makers have coffee breaks?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

Why do they announce power shortages
on TV?

Do you need a silencer when you shoot a
mime?

Why do you press harder on the
remote-control when you know the
battery is dead?

How can batteries die?

If its zero degrees tonight, and tomorrow
its meant to be twice as cold, how cold
will it be?

Why are buildings called buildings when
there finished? Shouldn't they be called
builts?

Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Why is it that when you tell a man there
are 400 billion stars he will believe you, but
when you tell him there's wet paint he has
to touch it?

Who's cruel idea was it to put a 'S' in 'lisp'?


Do you find it unnerving that what doctors
do is called 'practice'?

Would a fly without wings be called a
walk?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell is it
homeless or naked?

Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal
injections?

Dark Pages of my Life

My life really isn't that perfect (whose is) I know right! The dark times always tend to overshadow my brightest of moments. That is why Im writing about the dark pages of my life. Some bits may be interesting and others a tad bit outrageous, others.........well will find words for them :) . This is my Life.....






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